its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Randomize
