Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
Randomize
