Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize