I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
porn star boner night. come get it.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
Randomize
