I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
