butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
She even gives head with a lisp.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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