Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
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