I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
