Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
