so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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