Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Randomize
