I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I am one with the molecules
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize
