you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
