then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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