the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
it's like iHOP with fire
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
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