Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
