Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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