So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
