you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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