I'm eating all of the evidence.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Randomize
