I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Couch. On fire.
Randomize
