yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Randomize
