Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Congratulations! We have a period
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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