god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
He's on the porch naked. Help.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
