Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
