sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
I skipped work to stalk him.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
