The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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