why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Please don't give away my fajitas
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
