what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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