He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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