Its about making memories worth repressing
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
