were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Randomize
