I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
