How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
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