How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
There was a lot of him and a little penis
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
