Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Randomize
