it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
