i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Randomize
