new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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