Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
i think im in europe. pls send help
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
