I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I will be naked everywhere
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize
