New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Randomize
