i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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