That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
