ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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