Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
