I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
is it fun? or sober?
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
