What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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