he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
