I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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