i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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